Just Say Sorry

Lately, I have been avidly studying a Soto Zen text called the Shushōgi (修証義, “Meaning of Practice and Verification”), which I introduced here. It is a 19th century mashup of Dogen’s much longer Shobogenzo, but with an intended audience of lay followers, not monks.

This week, I wanted to mix up the usual schedule and post one chapter a day, Monday through Friday, five total. Each chapter is fairly short, but just long enough that each needs its own post.

Today, I wanted to explore the second chapter of five which delves into the importance of self-reflection and repentance. You find chapter one here.

As we saw in the first chapter we each have karmic burdens to carry. However, that is not the end of the story.

7. The buddhas and ancestors, because of their limitless sympathy, have opened the vast gates of compassion in order to lead all beings to awakening. Among humans and devas, who would not enter? Although karmic retribution for evil acts must come in one of the three times, repentance lessens the effects, or eliminates the bad karma and brings about purification.

translation provided by Soto Zen Text Project of Stanford University, courtesy of sotozen.net.

The idea, prevalent throughout Mahayana Buddhism, is that reflecting one your faults, and then confessing such transgressions is a way to diminish or prevent accumulated bad karma from coming to fruition. This isn’t like confession in a Western-Christian sense. It’s about weighing your conduct against a benchmark like the Dharma, and determining if you fell short anywhere. Of course, many Buddhists make mistakes regularly, but this self-reflection isn’t meant to instill shame. It’s about thinking rationally, almost scientifically. For you Star Trek fans: WWSD (What Would Spock [or Tuvok] Do?)

Joking aside, another way to look at it is rehearsing for a play. Even if you practice your lines 20 times, you’ll still make mistakes, but with time and diligence, you’ll get better and better at it, until you can recite your lines automatically. Then, you work in other acting skills, and so it becomes more than reciting lines, it becomes a performance. I find this helpful when trying to uphold the precepts in my own life. I mess up regularly, but I pick myself and try again until it sinks in and becomes a part of my life. Sometimes, this takes years.

8. Therefore, we should repent before [the] buddha in all sincerity. The power of the merit that results from repenting in this way before [the] buddha saves and purifies us. This merit encourages the growth of unobstructed faith and effort. When faith appears it transforms both self and other, and its benefits extend to beings both sentient and insentient.

Faith might seem like a strange word especially after talking about the importance of thinking rationally, but the two go hand in hand in Buddhism. Faith in Buddhism isn’t a “leap of faith” nor is it the Western-religious faith in a deity; it’s about confidence in the teacher and the teaching: the Buddha and the Dharma respectively. For new Buddhists, this faith is shaky at first, but through time and practice, one sees the fruit of living according to the Dharma, and one’s faith grows.

Further, Buddhist repentance isn’t done with a priest, it’s between yourself and the Buddha.

9. The gist of repentance is expressed as follows：”Although we have accumulated much bad karma in the past, producing causes and conditions that obstruct our practice of the way, may the buddhas and ancestors who have attained the way of the buddha take pity on us, liberate us from our karmic entanglements, and remove obstructions to our study of the way. May their merit fill up and hold sway over the inexhaustible dharma realm, so that they share with us their compassion.” Buddhas and ancestors were once like us; in the future we shall be like them.

The passage generally speaks for itself. But the final sentence is really important: what separates Buddhas from people is simply the degree of awakening. There is no separate divinity that separates us from them, and with diligent practice and good conduct, we can be assured that we will be Buddhas as well.

10. “All my past and harmful karma, born from beginningless greed, hate, and delusion, through body, speech, and mind, I now fully avow.” If we repent in this way, we will certainly receive the mysterious guidance of the buddhas and ancestors. Keeping this in mind and acting in the appropriate manner, we should openly confess before the buddha. The power of this confession will cut the roots of our bad karma.

This is a formula often used in many Buddhist services (translation variations notwithstanding). The specific words do not matter; it’s about reflecting that you have committed wrong acts rooted in the Three Poisons (a.k.a. craving, anger, and conceit), and to disavow your past conduct. In this way, you turn a new leaf and start anew.

Next, onto chapter three.

P.S. If you ever needed to know how the second chapter is traditionally recited, please enjoy this video: